Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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