i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
