Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
