we should wear snuggies to the strip club
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
So many bounce houses so little time
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
