Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
