She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
