And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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