umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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