Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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