Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
