is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
