Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
