Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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