Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
