Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
