i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
