i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i love accidental penises.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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