I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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