he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
