Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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