id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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