Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
