3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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