is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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