so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm bleeding and have questions
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
