Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
