I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
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