I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
