only you would photoshop your dick
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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