you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
