Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
