Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
