I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
