I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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