hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize