Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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