I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
