he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
