Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
