I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
