you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
