Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
