My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Randomize