I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
