The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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