all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
My vagina is very pro this idea
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
