my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize
