Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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