Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
we're making bets on your personal life
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
