I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
