My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
